August, 2005

To say that both the men in our house have needed a haircut for a while is an UNDERSTATEMENT! Mr L used to have long hair back in the old days and was trying to recreate the look, however back then he wasn’t going grey or starting to thin at the front! Jay on the other hand was not attempting any sort of fashion statement, I have just been too lazy to take him to the barbers for a few months and the results were not good.

On Thursday Jay was staying with my mum overnight and she rang to say that she had tried to cut his fringe but he moved a lot and it wasn’t exactly straight. She wasn’t kidding! He looked like some sort of weird monk, you would have though she’d used a knife and fork to cut it instead of scissors. When he woke up this morning it looked even worse than it had done the night before, if thats possible.

So as soon as the shops opened I rushed to the nearest chemist/pharmacy and bought a set of professional hair clippers. I came back and straight away proceeded to even out Jays hair. The result …. short but even and tidy. Mr L then decided he wanted a go and began to shave his own head. This started to look a bit patchy as he couldn’t see what he was doing, so I took over and finished the job. I was a bit worried as I am not known for my skills in precision tasks, but these clippers really are foolproof, they must be if I can use them!

Both boys now look as if they are off to join the army! But no one will be laughing at their mullets anymore, so all in all I’d say ?10 well spent!

Saturday, August 6th, 2005 // Family Life

In other news today, Orlaith McAllister has had her eyes opened since leaving the Big Brother house - and she’s not a happy ex-housemate!

“Did you know other women have breasts too?” she fumed during an interview yesterday. “I thought I was the only one! I should be basking in the glow of a thousand paparazzi flash bulbs right now, but all I can think about is whether someone has better boobs than me!”

Yes folks, the bottle-blonde whinger is out of the BB house and coming to a Page 3 near you.

As a bloke, I never expected to ever utter these words, but: If I never saw Orlaith McAllister’s boobs again it would just be too soon! Orlaith, you have been evicted from the human race….please leave the planet!

Friday, August 5th, 2005 // News & Media

Good news for Belfast City Centre! A redevelopment plan has been agreed for the northerly part of the city centre. This includes both sides of Royal Avenue and Smithfield Market.

Smithfield has been in decline for years, despite being right next door to the popular CastleCourt complex. It’s possible that it has been tainted by the seedy shops down Gresham Street.

I’m not sure if they’re planning to level the site and rebuild something grander, but I’m glad to see the area getting a bit more attention. Better still, the BBC article reckons that the redevelopment will create 4,000 new jobs.

On the down side, Belfast’s Lord Mayor, Wallace Brown was quoted as saying “I want to see creative and imaginative improvements in our shopping streets that will give people a new buzz about Belfast.” I thought we’d agreed to stop saying Belfast’s Got The Buzz!!!

Friday, August 5th, 2005 // Northern Ireland: Politics

In order to create a newsworthy soundbyte/statstic, theLeveeBreaks has discovered that Google has 608 references to “historic ira statement” compared with just 1 reference to “ira tossers“.

This proves conclusively that the Internet believes the IRA and the DUP should begin decommissioning Ian Paisley.

Friday, August 5th, 2005 // Northern Ireland: Politics

The BBC reports that three people are facing charges for rioting on the twelfth of July. Another six people have been arrested in connection with the Loyalist feud.

Let’s hope that the justice system makes examples of these people. It’s not right that hundreds of police officers are injured in these skirmishes, while violent youths get away without consequences.

These ghettoes have been lawless for too long. The police force must tackle this anti-social behaviour, but they need community support to do this. If people allow their neighbourhoods to become overrun by yob culture, they will find it very hard to get rid of. Community groups, churches and individuals need to work with the PSNI to restore law and order.

Friday, August 5th, 2005 // Northern Ireland: Politics

Well the kids are in my mums, the house is clean and I don’t know what to do with myself. I am too sore and stiff to go anywhere that involves walking or even driving for more than 15 minutes. I have no books to read and daytime TV is a load of tripe. I know that now would be the ideal time to turn my attention to the dreaded tax return but I just don’t want to. Ah well, any suggestions gratefully received!

Wednesday, August 3rd, 2005 // Family Life

OK, I’m in the mood for a game today.

Read the statement below and guess whether the speaker is from a Nationalist or Unionist background:

“I grew up in a housing estate in Belfast. The area was pretty run-down and every other gable wall had a mural with some kind of statement on it. Large gangs of kids frequently hung about the streets, with nothing better to do than drink in the alleyways.

The area I lived in was ‘run’ by one of the major terror groups of the troubles. People who didn’t agree with their way of doing things either kept their heads down or were forced out of the neighbourhood.

When I was younger, my father spent a few years in jail for possessing weapons, and my mother worked a couple of jobs to make ends meet. We lived in a fairly close community, with aunts, uncles and cousins living in nearby streets. Some of them were ‘involved’ and two of my uncles and a cousin were shot and killed during the troubles.”

Well? Did the speaker grow up in a Nationalist or Unionist area?

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005 // Northern Ireland: Politics

I had to do a quick post to congratulate Mr Levee who has just got his first BBC mention. I was checking our stats and noticed that a lot of people were being referred to us by the BBC news website so I had a look, only to find that Mr L and his ramblings on the IRA ceasefire had merited a mention by Alan Connor of the BBC. Have a look, I’m sure he will be chuffed!

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005 // News & Media, Northern Ireland: Politics

In among all the analysis, counter analysis, and even the in-depth counter analysis of the IRA statement, you could be forgiven for missing the other historic statement which took place in Ballymena on Friday.

Following on from the vandalism of two Catholic churches in the town, members of the nearby Protestant High Kirk church cleaned grafitti off the walls and doors of the Church Of Our Lady in Harryville. Members of the High Kirk congregation also presented massgoers with roses in an unprecedented gesture of goodwill.

At a time when ‘Actions Not Words’ is the mantra of Unionist politicians, it’s refreshing to see people getting up and doing something positive rather than just talking about change. I hope this sends a clear message to people in Northern Ireland: your religeon and your politics are one facet of your identity, they shouldn’t stop you from showing decency and respect toward other human beings!

I’d love to see more of these random acts - they’re better than the structured, cross-community programs because they are heartfelt and spontaneous, not planned. A commenter on the Slugger O’Toole website shared the following experience.

In late June, a young protestant school kid in Randalstown was so angered at loyalists erecting a union jack outside a catholic school that he took it down on his way to school and gave it to his teachers, saying he did not want his catholic friends to feel intimidated. - Comment on Slugger O’Toole

Hopefully we’ll hear more of this in the news in the weeks and months ahead. In my book, this is more of an historic statement, more of a seismic shift in our culture than a statement from terrorists can ever be.

Monday, August 1st, 2005 // Northern Ireland: Politics